Two Dreams at Once

Holy shit.

1. Dreams do come true!
2. Life is funny.

Nine months ago I made a rather drastic and sudden choice to leave everything and everyone I knew and uproot from a nice little life I had for myself in Atlanta. I didn’t have any particular hard-set plans or any good reason to leave Georgia, I just needed a change. Ever since July it has seemed like my life has been moving at warp speed; new city, new job, new people, new opportunities– one right after the other. It has been at times difficult to reconcile my lingering homesickness for Atlanta with my excitement about everything currently going on, and the other night I was hit very suddenly with a train wreck of emotions in that regard. Hanging out on the couch with Jeremiah and awaiting news about my newest endeavor I just lost it a little bit, overwhelmed by how much life can change in such a short amount of time. Grateful and humbled and excited and scared all at the same time, I was crying thinking about where I was a year ago, what all I left behind, and where I might find myself in the next few months, and what all I stand to gain (and also potentially sacrifice) at this point.

As of last Friday, I can finally officially spill the beans about my most recent and exciting news!! Amazingly, though, it is not my only recent and exciting news, which is why this post is going to sound like a mixed bag of emotions. I’d like to preface this by being clear that my little fussing in here is meant with humor and that I’m only sharing because this feels so ironic, like some grand rom-com plot twist– I am actually incredibly humbled and grateful and don’t know how I got this lucky.

Recently the universe handed me, on a shiny polished oval silver platter with caviar and 24 karat gold chocolate sprinkles, three amazing things at damn near the exact same time. Things everybody walking this earth wants– my dream job, my dream music partner, and my dream man!!! Fucking amazing right?!?!?!

AAAAHH SO AMAZING

BUT ALSO SO FUCKED UP, UNIVERSE!!!!!!!!!!!

Let me tell you why I am shaking my fist at the ironic little bitch of a universe while simultaneously sending thanks and feeling gracious beyond belief…

First of all, I just landed my dream job. Clearly the ultimate dream job is to be Beyonce, but this is the next best thing and how I get to pay my bills until then. I’ve kept pretty tight-lipped about it because I didn’t want to jinx it and because talking about it made me feel so damn excited at even the possibility of getting this job that I didn’t want to get my hopes up and then be crushed if it didn’t happen. But it happened, and now I can brag my ass off. Over the last four months, I have been going through a very rigorous interview process with Trek Travel (as in Trek Bicycles). Trek Travel organizes and hosts bicycle tour vacations around the world, sending small groups to the most beautiful places on earth for a week at a time to bike and stay at fancy hotels and eat fancy food and fucking just have the fucking most amazing fucking time (check out the trips on their site TrekTravel.com). To do this, they hire tour guides who are in charge of the day-to-day bicycle stuff, trip logistics, and general hospitality/customer service experience while leading the trips on the road. The interview process is goddamn extensive (read about it here: “Is This The World’s Toughest Hiring Process?”); beginning in November I had weeks of phone and Skype interviews, then in January they invited me to Madison, Wisconsin for a weekend of in-person interviews and skills testing (which was easily the most competitive & intense day of my entire life trying out for anything), and THEN there was a ten-day final tryout in California that I just got back from, where they had whittled the initial several hundred (if not thousand) applicants down to about 20. Over the course of ten days, we learned how to do everything from bicycle mechanics to van support to trip guiding to route planning. We got to cycle through California wine country on some very nice bicycles. I spent a week and a half building a team with some of the coolest people I have ever had the honor of meeting. We became a fast family and it was quickly obvious that I have never wanted any job more than I wanted this gig.

Well guess fucking what.

I get to lead bicycle tours around the world. As a JOB. FOR MONEY.

WHAT?! Just, what?!

Beginning in March, I will be sent to various regions (Vermont?! Utah?! France?! Spain?! Bali!? SURE!) for several weeks at a time– housed and fed by Trek Travel– to help plan and lead week-long tours on bicycles with different groups of vacationers. I will get paid American dollars for this “work.” And I get to be part of one of the coolest teams of people I have ever met. My first stop is Majorca, off the coast off Spain. Just a quick Google image search for you here. That’s home for the next several weeks.

Sick. Just sick.

So why is there any bit of apprehension in this post?! How on earth could this possibly be anything less than perfection?!

Well let’s talk about the other grand gifts the universe handed me of late.

First of all is my amazing writing partner, Matt. I met Matt only a few weeks after I moved to Denver and our music writing chemistry was just insane from the get-go. He is an incredibly talented musician and we write so fluidly and easily together that within six weeks of being a band, we were opening for Macy Gray. Since that show, we have continued to write songs that I feel so so so so so so SO good about, have been planning on recording an album, and been discussing plans for shows around Denver and later, beyond. I have never felt so good about a music project before this, or had such confidence that my music will be heard by a lot of people very soon. I cannot WAIT to share this stuff with y’all– I have never been more proud as an artist of any work.

Hold that thought. Let’s talk about the other incredible gift the universe plopped in my lap recently.

His name is Jeremiah and he is fucking amazing. Jeremiah if you are reading this, haayeee boooo! Kissy face emoji. x5.

If you know me, you know that I have never really seriously dated anybody long-term, never earnestly done the boyfriend-girlfriend thing, not really a gal who has any good experience in the relationship world to speak of. Then in walks Jeremiah. Literally from ten minutes into our first date, there hasn’t been any topic we have not been able to talk about openly. His communication style and mine are so similar that I never have to second guess anything he says to me, or anything I say to him. There has been no guess work, no insecurity, no doubt in any part of our relationship thus far– everything is just out there, everything feels safe. Even the hard stuff. He is open, he is honest, he is kind, he is funny, he is incredibly good-looking, he is fucking smart as shit, he is strong, he calms down the anxious part of me just by being near. I admire so much about him and this has been the most natural feeling thing from the moment we met. Little Miss Independent now wants to spend every waking second just snuggled up with this man who I can’t get enough of.

So of course NOW– with an AMAZING band and an AMAZING boyfriend also newly part of my world– would be the time I get the job that will send me away for five or six weeks at a goddamn time.

….!!

Before, when I first applied to this gig, all I had to worry about was who would love Chevy as much as me while I’m away, and who might be able to tolerate Memphis. Now there is this amazing human being who I am in crazy in love with and will have to be away from for weeks at a time. There is a music project that I have complete faith is going to be actually successful IN REAL LIFE, which I want to work on and perfect and tour around so everyone can hear it.

How do you choose between parallel dreams?!

If you’re me, you don’t. You do all three.

Of course because he is who he is, Jeremiah is 300% supportive of this dream of mine and he’s down to make this happen. Matt and the band also recognize what kind of opportunity this is and have been super positive about it all. My entire world is fully on-board with this new endeavor and I am fully prepared to make sure everything I want to accomplish comes to fruition. I could not possibly be more motivated and determined.

The next few months are going to be wild. I will be traveling a lot between Denver and who-knows-where. I will be in some gorgeous places, meeting lots of people. I will likely spend all of my in-between time at home writing music and recording and doing shows– keeping this awesome project rolling with the support of Matt and the band. I will probably try to glue Jeremiah to my right side so I can spend as much time as possible with him between trips. Knowing myself as well as I do, I know that this can and will all work out amazingly– it will take planning and communication and determination. I’m on top of it. The amazing people in my life are on top of it. What a ride.

I know everybody imagines their little dream life and how it’s gonna look and they work really hard to get it. I’ve done that, too, and I’ve still got even more dreaming to do. But I definitely never imagined that such great things would ever just find me, let alone at the very same time or in a way that would make it feel so bittersweet. The universe has a funny way of showing us who’s boss. It never ceases to amaze me that I am surrounded by such goodness all the time, and I do not take any of this for granted.

Nine months ago I took a huge leap of faith and abruptly left everything I knew. I moved to a place where I hardly knew anybody and where I really didn’t have anything set up, no ideas of what would come. I set out only to improve myself and to find the things that make me happy.

Holy shit is that working out well.

Submit a comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s